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Shitty Christmas

3 years ago, my mom died on December 22. It was a total blur. What Christmas? My daughter and niece wore their Christmas dresses to the funeral. Merry Fucking Christmas.  Christmas 2019 marked the one year anniversary of my mom's death. Oh, and I was about 2 1/2 months post Achilles rupture. The entire family gather together, which was nice. At the start of the Christmas Eve dinner my father tried to say the Our Father (in Polish). He couldn't finish it...my sister did. Lots of tears. That Christmas sucked too...a part of us was missing.  Christmas 2020 was a very Merry Covid Christmas. My dad joined me, Steve, and the kids. It was a quiet Christmas. A very white Christmas, which was nice. But very mellow. And Christmas 2021? Well, Steve was isolating in Cancun, while the kids and I were home. Merry Fucking Christmas. Isn't the Christmas season supposed to be filled with joy and cheer? Lately, Christmas seasons have been filled with sorrow and sadness and lots of tears.  **

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