Tuesday, August 23, 2011

maybe I should write checklists

I know I have said it dozens of times before, but I will again establish that I don't know a thing about flying a plane.  What I do know, however, is that pilots use checklists at work.  Lots of lots of checklists.

*****
We left for Vegas on Monday.  We dropped the kids off at my parents on Sunday.  Sunday morning I was treated to a mani-pedi and was enjoying a relaxing morning.  Leading up to a vacation is only work...and extra extra work with two kids...and extra extra extra work since Steve was on a 5-day trip leading up to vacation.  Needless to say, I was feeling the pressure of the trip.  I was all relaxed after my appointment, and then I came home to caios.

Just to establish a couple things: Steve is a great husband and father.  Steve helps out as much as he can.  I didn't tell Steve what time we were leaving to drop the kids off. I didn't tell Steve that he needed to pack the kids toys before we left.  I had all these thoughts in my head, yet I didn't vocalize anything.

During my appointment, I was thinking I would come home to a packed car, the kids eating lunch, and within minutes we would be on the road.

Nope.  I came home to crying kids. Steve was trying to get Ben to take toys to my parent's and leave them there in a effort to de-clutter.  Ben was not at all interested in departing with any toys.  CC was cranky since she was hungry and it was nap time. 

I started lunch, I tried to defuse the toy situation, with Steve's permission so that I wouldn't step on his toes, and then I lost it.

I actually yelled at Steve in front of the kids. Something I rarely do.  "Why didn't you do anything?  What have you been doing these last two hours?!" I yelled with tears in my eyes. 

"But, Joanna, you didn't tell me to do any of this. How can you get mad at me?  I didn't know you wanted to leave right away. You never told me what time we were leaving" he said to me.  "If you wanted me to do this, you should have told me."

"Steve...THINK!"  More frustration tears fell. "I can't be supermom all the time and think of everything all the time to tell you.  Think!" as I pointed to my head.  Talk about blowing your top.

I did later apologize to Steve for snapping at him. 

If I would have left him a list, a checklist, of everything that needed done, he would have done it, no doubt.

- get out two boxes
- give Ben one box to fill with toys to leave at Babcia's house
- give Ben one box to fill with toys to play at Babcia's house and bring back home
- gather blankets and stuffed animals the kids want to take to Babcia's
- load car with the items the kids will take to Babcia's
- make lunch
- feed the kids lunch
- wait for me as I arrive home from my mani-pedi with a huge smile on your face and greet me with a big hug
- get into car and drive away into the sunset with LaLaLa songs playing in the background

*****

After our return from Vegas, I took Ben and my cousins to Niagara Falls.  Meanwhile, Steve stayed back at our house with CC.

Before we left Niagara Falls I called Steve to tell him we were on our way home. ETA 4 hours.

At 5:21p Steve called me.  "I am going grocery shopping. We have no food in the house.  Tell me what I should get," he asked me.

"OJ" I said.

"We have some" Steve replied.

"Bread" I said.

"We have some" Steve replied.

I rattled off about five other items, staple items, and aside from tortilla chips we had everything.

"Steve, if there is this food in the house then why are you asking what we need?" I said.

"BECAUSE CC NEEDS DINNER AND THERE IS NOTHING TO EAT" he said to me in frustration.

"Steve, don't get upset with me.  Feed her spaghetti and tomato sauce, and I will go grocery shopping tomorrow" I told him.

In the same frustrated tone he said "but, I could have gone grocery shopping today."

And I simply replied "then, why didn't you?" Because I didn't give him a checklist.

I do have to add that Steve did do the laundry that day, so it isn't like he didn't do anything.  He did, however, wash a new silk shirt I bought for our trip (see below).  Let's hope it still fits....


*****

I know there are pilot wives out there that joke about the whole checklist thing, and how they need to do checklists for their pilot husbands.  I never thought it applied to Steve...I have known him since 1999, so you would think that I know a thing or two about him.  But these last two examples, over the last week mind you, are proof that I may need to start doing this.

3 comments:

  1. What day were you at the falls?? You guys could have come here for dinner! Cousins and all :) We are only 1/2 an hour away and on your way back home.

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  2. Hmmmm...I have avoided the checklist so I don't seem like a nag...but maybe my pilot wants/needs a checklist to get things done...

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  3. I love this! I should write checklists for my husband too.... because there are times when I think I've told him something but never actually did. He continues to tell me he isn't a mind reader. Checklists would be a good thing. (:

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