Sunday, April 15, 2012

I am coming home to this?!

I am slowly but surely getting my much-needed attitude adjustment.  A bad attitude for me means that I am quiet, don't interact much, and I do the minimum to get by since I have no motivation.  I don't go out of my way to be superstar and I do what it takes to survive.  When Steve is gone, this means the kids are fed, clean and happy...and maybe the house work goes by the wayside a bit.

When Steve got home from his last trip, I still wasn't my cheery self.  This meant that I wasn't a good pilot wife who performed all the good pilot wife duties that I usually do before Steve gets home.  You know, usually I greet him at the door wearing a dress, apron and heels, holding some fresh-baked goods...


The kids basically attacked Steve when he got in the door and hugs and hugs and hugs were exchanged.  Boy, were they excited to see him!  He then went upstairs to change, with the kids in tow, while I finished up dinner.  We all sat down and ate.  The evening flew by.  The kids and Steve were playing while I was preparing for a business trip that took me to Atlanta.

The kids eventually went to bed and Steve and I settled in.  I take that back...I settled in.  Steve, on the other hand, went into overdrive.  For all the work that I didn't do when he was gone, he did it...in about 20 minutes.  I swear, he was like a machine.  I was sitting on my ass watching tv while eating a bag of potato chips and drinking a beer...wait, nutrition what?!  

Now, let me make something clear so I don't look all that bad.  My definition of straightened up is far different from Steve's definition.  To me, if all the kids toys are piled nicely in the corner, I considered that straightened up.  Steve, on the other hand, can't have any piles and all the toys have to be put away.  Another example, a pile of mail on the counter is acceptable me to.  To him, he has to have all the mail put away.  See where I am going here...


So, there I was, sitting on my ass, stuffing my face with potato/lard goodness, and Steve was nearly sweating from his work.  All the while he was missing Modern Family, which he loves.  This just proves he was on a mission. 

During this whirlwind, he stepped on almonds that were in the carpet.  Apparently the kids spilled some, but they were camouflaged in the carpet so I never noticed them to pick them up.  And my lack of superstar-ness didn't make for me sweeping the floors, so they were a mess.  He was a millisecond from just losing it from frustration and anger, I could just tell, but he contained himself.  Good man.  He knew I had an attitude and saying anything to me would have started WWIII.  Because if he did mention something about my lack of the almond pick-up I would have gone off on what I did do when he was gone: worked, did pick up and drop off from school, fed the kids, bathed the kids, played with the kids, cleaned up messes, ect.  I do all the aforementioned willingly and happily.  But, if Steve calls me out on what I don't do, then I go off. 

Is that fair to him?  No. But, he knows me well enough by now to know what the right thing to do is.  I take that back, it isn't necessarily the "right thing" but rather the "path of least resistance."   It also isn't fair to him because I know the first thing he wants to do when he gets home from a trip is relax in the evening...not break a sweat from having to do all the straightening up that his bad-attitude pilot wife didn't do. 

He finally settled down, with beer in hand, and started to watch tv.  I should also mention that he did turn to me, at one point, and asked if I was going to eat the entire bag of chips.  I never said I was perfect.  I did, however, promptly get up and throw the chips away. Good-bye potato/lard goodness.  I will miss you. 

Do I feel badly that Steve came home from his last trip to a house that wasn't to his standard of clean and my bad attitude? Yes.  I have said before that as a pilot wife you should make your home welcoming to your pilot when he gets home.  MAKE him want to come home.  I failed.  

Steve on the other hand, did not fail.  I am thankful that Steve bit his lip when he came home to a less than perfect house.  Sometimes a pilot wife struggles when her pilot is on a trip.  We can't be perfect all the time.  I am thankful that Steve recognizes what I need, and he doesn't push things.  This, my friends, is a good man.  There are two parts to a successful couple and since this is my blog you usually read about my successes.  This post, however, shows Steve success.  



4 comments:

  1. What a good guy! It's hard sometimes to be the perfect pilot wife. Good for you letting him take care of things ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am lucky...lucky that he still puts up with my shit ;-)

      Delete
  2. You could have just described a night in my house with my husband coming home from a trip. I'm glad I'm not the only pilot's wife who feels this way. I'm SO glad I stumbled upon your blog :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. welcome! It happens...we can't be superstars all the time :)

      Delete