#pilotwife tweets expanded

I love telling stories, and sometime twitter just doesn't give me enough space to saw all I want to say.  So, this blog post is all of my #pilotwife tweets...expanded!

I have news to share w/ him and he is currently flying. I may or may not be obsessively tracking his flight to see when he lands
** we are taking a Disney Cruise, and we got our room assignment.  We had been checking our reservation daily to get the information, and of course the first time I see the room number Steve was flying.  So, I checked...and checked...and checked his flight until I saw it "landed"  I gave it, oh, about 5 minutes and then I called him right away.

** not related to the tweet above, but a similar story of me obsessively checking Steve's flight is when I was in labor with #1.  You bet I was checking every 2 minutes for that "landed" and I called his ass the second I saw that great word!

See those two blond heads in the foreground...both kids are laying on me. See Daddy over there?

** one word: attachment.  My kids are very much attached to me, and this is understandable.  This picture was taken the day Steve got home from a trip...don't worry, the kids warmed right back up and they were happily sitting in Daddy's lap later that weekend.

He was sleeping and I woke him up. Now I feel like a big ole' asshole
The day after Christmas, the kids and I drove down to my sister's for the long weekend.  A couple days later Steve finished a trip with a red-eye, and figured that he would either drive the 2 hours OR he would catch a commute down, which was due to leave about 2 hours after he got in from his red-eye.  Sure enough he caught the commute...and sure enough my impatient ass called his sleeping ass to "check in."  His first response was "I told you I would call you"  Yeah, I felt like an big ole' ass.  There is nothing worse than interrupting his sleep post red-eye.

sick kiddo. Pilot is working. Super mom goes into action to coordinate my work schedule and a sitter for the kids.
On this day in particular, by the time Steve called me mid-afternoon he had NO idea what was going on.  I had done all the coordinating.  No wonder I have a hard time sometimes switching back to the "two parents" mode, after having to fly solo with kids for 4 days and make all the decisions.

He moved my item last night. I just spent 10 minutes looking for it. He was flying so I couldnt call.
Steve took two of my bags, that I needed for a weekend trip, and put them in the basement.  He didn't tell me where he was putting them, so I spent 10 minutes looking for them.  Of course he was flying during this frustrated time, so I couldn't call him.

I actually get quit pissed about this topic...there are times when he gets on these cleaning rampages and just goes nuts.  Of course he isn't telling me the new places for all these items as he is moving them...and of course when I am looking for said item he is 37k feet in the air.

I want to text him I ♥ and miss him. Is he asleep? Perhaps. I wont text. This is how words get lost for the moment
I often think of Steve when he is gone, and I get warm fuzzies.  When I know he is up and around, I will text him my kind words.  But, if I am not sure what he is up to I will keep the words to myself so that I don't interrupt him.

And if I am feeling really mooshy-gooshy, and not sure of his whereabouts I will put a message on his facebook wall...you know something that makes you throw up a little in your mouth.  But, that is the most non-invasive way telling him my feelings so they don't get lost from the moment.

Effective birth control is not having your pilot around when you are ovulating
The body is an amazing thing.  Women are most raring to go when they are ovulating.  Makes sense, as this is the prime time to have makes babies.  Well, when your lover is 3 time zones away, that is pretty effective birth control!

Haven't really heard from him all day and his perfectly planned cockpit call had to be cut short because he had to work.
This happens ALL THE TIME.  I don't hear from him all day.  I don't know why, as the day consisted of sleeping in and breakfast and a workout. No text. Nothing.  But, when I finally do hear from him he is in the cockpit and probably 2 minutes from push.  I know what he is thinking as he is dialing my number "shit...I haven't talked to Joanna all day...better call her now."

My view right now. Wine. Favorite snack. Real Housewives. Messy house. Kids are asleep. Enjoying life
When Steve isn't home, and if my day has been crazy insane, there are times when I plop my ass down on the chair the second after I tuck the kids in for the night.  As I sit there, enjoying my favorite snack, favorite wine, and favorite show, I can't even think about picking up the house.  There is no one to impress, so I just let things be, enjoy the moment, and relax!

I hadn't seen his handsome face in 3 days, and not one minute in the door he scowls "there is a stink in the house"
When Steve is flying the friendly skies for 4 days, I often think of him fondly.  I usually track his final leg, and really anticipate his arrival.  I have all these dreamy thoughts in my head...

...and then I hear the garage door open.  "Daddy's home!"  I see his handsome face in his good lookin' blazer and then I hear "there is a stink in the house!" with a scowl on his face.  No "Hi, Honey" no kiss...nothing but a bad comment about stank in the house.  Really?!

Doing laundry. Hung up his shirt and smelled his cologne. Held his shirt to my nose for a minute. Absence makes the heart grow fonder
This usually happens most when I am really missing him.  And when I really miss him is when I look for anything to connect to him.  It could be his shirt, his pillow, his towel...

He is due home. House: clean and quiet. Fire: blazing. Kids: down. Food: hot. Wine: plenty. He better f**king appreciate it b/c Mama is beat!
In an effort to keep Steve happy, I really try my hardest to have the house clean and settled when he gets home from a trip. But, it isn't always easy work!  Sometimes it is, but other times the house is such a mess that it takes 2+ hours to get it in order.  And this tweet was one of those times where I was GO from the second I got home from work until he came home...to a clean, warm, comfortable house.

I thought he was flying. He called me I answered nervously. Was he crashing and calling 2 say bye? I had looked @ his pairing wrong
I know that flying is safe.  I know that.  I know that Steve is very likely to retire without a life-threatening incident at work. I know that.  But, every now and again I can't help but have morbid thoughts run through my head.  And when his face appears on the incoming call on my cell phone when I *think* he is flying, my heart skips a bit.  This tweet was a simply error on my reading his schedule earlier that day.

Kids r asleep. House is quiet. Wine poured. He is out w/ the guys. As much as I can miss his absence, sometimes I love being alone
When Steve is on a trip there is a void in the house.  There is lonely in the house.  When Steve is home, and is out with the guys, there is no void in the house and I don't feel lonely.  Only a pilot wife understands this difference.  This particular night Steve went out with friends...and I enjoyed my quiet evening in the house, without being lonely.

when my sister looked up "FBO" on The Google she told me it came up as "full body orgasm"
Steve was FBOed twice in November.  I think it was November.  He posted something on facebook about it.  Since many people don't know that FBO means "flown by operations" my sister did her own research on The Google.  She then posted on Steve's facebook post that she came up with "full body orgasm" I mean...come on!  Hilarious!!!!!  As if!

gotta love when u r sharing an intimate moment w/ your husband and his airline's commercial comes on the tv...that damn iconic music
Not making this up!  Steve and I were sharing a 'moment' and his airline's commercial came on tv.  I mean, really?!  When Steve is away from work, he wants to be away!  And when Steve is with me, I would imagine that work is the last thought on his mind.  And then this reminder comes up?  *Nice*

her shoes are lost. he put them away. he is either sleeping or 38K+ feet in the air. child is screaming
Another #Don'tMoveMyShit moment where Steve puts an item somewhere that only he knows...and then is not available when I need to call him to ask where the item is.  I was racing to find her shoes to get out the door for school...Cici was screaming...I was approaching my red zone and about to lose it!  As I stated above...this really pisses me off, something good!

movie for the kids on a school night? Yes...because it helps with my sanity
This is a win-win.  I have had enough with my day, so I popped in a movie for the kids.  The kids have a fun night and think I am "cool" to allow this.  Sometimes us pilot wives do whatever we can to make it through the day.

Trans-con, 3 hour sit, another flight blocked @ 2 hours. Wonder what mood is going to be walking in the door tonight
Steve can come home from the most crappy trip and be an absolute peach.  Steve can come home from a cake trip and be the biggest ass.  I try my hardest to set the mode straight in the house when he is due home, in an effort to keep things as happy as can be.  But I surely do wait to see what walks through the door, and react accordingly. And at this point in the game, I am able to judge in a couple minutes, sometimes even a couple seconds....and at this point in the game I know how to respond so that everyone is happy.

Filling out kid's school paperwork: his work address? Wish I could write in "somewhere in the sky"
Gotta love this one.  I work, and when I fill in my work address, it is easy.  But for Steve? Not so much.  I mean I could fill in the corporate headquarters.  Or, I could fill in his hub.  Or, I could just give a general city...which is what I usually do.  When people see his "employer" as an airline, and his "occupation" as "pilot" I think people get it.

You know you are a when you get to an intersection, look, and then tell your husband "clear right"
I don't know if Steve shared the "clear right" info because he wants my assistance, or if he is just sharing in general.  But either way, I totally do the "clear right" when it calls for it.  And then I pretend that I am his FO on a wide-body about ready to fly off to an exotic location.  Just kidding...

Just now in the car: 
Son: Mommy, when is Daddy going to be home? 
Pilot: I am home now.

All four of us were in the car driving home.  Steve was driving, and I was in the passenger seat.  The car was quiet and Ben then asked "Mommy, when is Daddy going to be home?"  I looked at Steve and he said "Ben, I am home."  Talk about being in such a habit!  Ben is used to Daddy being gone, so perhaps he forgot that Steve was home for that split second.

you know you are away from your too long when you actually do a double take at a a shirtless Justin Beiber picture
This happened at work, and was borderline inappropriate lunchtime talk...as I expressed my desire for Steve to be home.  But, really, what gal who is missing her husband wouldn't look at a shirtless muscular guy with those same thoughts.

me: I broke the bike brake, you have to fix it 
him: Why did you touch it? 
 me: because you weren't f**king home!
I broke Ben's bike brake, in an attempt to fix it.  Shit happens.  These are the things that are meant for a Daddy to do, not a Mommy.  At least this Mommy.  And these are the times when a pilot wife may get a little steamed when trying her best, but to only fail.

Tornado warnings. Pilot is gone...of course.
There are plenty of times when I am home alone with kids when situations happen.  We actually once had a tornado touch down about 5 miles from here.  Steve was gone, as the kids and I huddled in the basement.  Shit happens.  Us pilot wives sure do hold down the fort when we need to!

8 text messages, over 3 days, and all with no response. He has gone radio silent on me. Hello? Is this thing on?
Truth.  I actually did the count on this because I wanted to make sure I was correct.  I had reached out to him all this much, all with no response.  Sucks, but I have learned to deal with it, and not think much of it.


  1. hey nice post mehn. I like your style of writing. The way you writes reminds me of an equally interesting post that I read some time ago on Daniel Uyi's blog titled How Are You Spending Your Remaining Days? .
    keep up the good work.


  2. Love following your blog, and love seeing the Steelers blanket even more!

  3. Thank you for all these great posts. My pilot-husband and I had a big fight right before he left on a four-day. And I feel like butt. But I'm hopeful we'll be able to "reset" when he gets back. My #1 issue is that I hate being a single-mom and b/c I told my husband that before we married, I feel like that should make a difference. But it doesn't. It is very helpful to be reminded that I have to accept it (and accept that I've gotta bounce back into dual-parenting when he's home). Being a pilot's wife is hard. Being a pilot's wife in a base 4000 miles away from your family is even harder. And my pilot really likes his "me" time - which grew when we moved to our new base b/c there are lots of fun man-things to do here. So he's gone even more (hello abandonment issues!). He is a good guy, but man, this can be so hard. Thank you for your encouraging words. I really needed them.

    1. I hate to say this, but you have to learn to not hate being a single-mom...because that is your reality. Instead of hating it, you need to adjust whatever it is so that you can learn to deal with this life, and make the most of it! If that means extra "me" time, or a house cleaner, or whatever..do it!

      As for the abandonment issues...let me through something else out: your love tank isn't full. I was told my a marriage counselor that I had abandonment issues, until I learned on my own that my love tank wasn't full. You should read: The Five Love Languages...I think this will help!

      Yes, being a pilot wife can be very hard!! And that is why I blog...to vent and make me feel better :)


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