Well folks, we came across a new issue. Maybe the issue has been around lately, but this issue has just been coming up again and again lately.
The general theme of this post is about pilots and their type A personalities....and how it trickles down to me, the wife.
According to Wikipedia, Type A is:
an individual as ambitious, aggressive, business-like, controlling, highly competitive, impatient, preoccupied with his or her status, time-conscious, and tightly-wound. People with Type A personalities are often high-achieving "workaholics" who multi-task, push themselves with deadlines, and hate both delays and ambivalence.
Pilots, generally speaking, are Type A. In fact, they even have to take special training (CRM) to address good communication in the cockpit, since two Type A people may not always work well together.
Steve and I have had conversations in the past about Type A. I usually don't see his Type A personality at home. His response to it is "I know where to step back, and let you lead." Good man.
Well folks, I have been seeing his type A personality come out pretty good lately.
A couple weeks ago (rememeber when I had pink eye), I stayed home that day from work and was able to get the house really straightened up and cleaned. During that trip, I had also made and installed a screen in the powder room
and installed magnetic door stops in the mudroom so that the doors don't slam shut when a stiff breeze comes through.
These were just little shit things that needed done, but Steve never got around to it. I am not razzing him, it is just that there isn't enough hours in the day when he is home.
So, that day he gets home from work. Anticipation usually fills the house the day Steve gets home. I was looking forward to him getting home...I had done some projects, the house was clean, the weather was beautiful and I just needed some relief after a pretty hectic couple of days.
He walks in the house. I know to back off when he gets in the door. He walks right upstairs, puts his bag away, changes out of his uniform, and then usually goes into the kitchen to eat something. I was following him like a lost puppy dog during this routine.
After a bit I showed him everything I did. The only thing he said to me was "these door stops aren't going to hold. (Then he gives them a strong wiggle-wiggle). See, after a while, these are just going to snap off."
Hear that wind come out of my sails?
And this is where the Type A thing comes in. This needed done, yet he wasn't doing it. I am home 4 more days a week than he is, so I was sick of hearing the door slam shut. I did what I did, as best as I could...but, it wasn't to his standard.
Our anniversary is June 21. I usually like to get Steve a nice gift. I like to think of myself as a thoughtful person when it comes to gift giving, and I like to get something that is special.
This year I had our handy-man-can-do-anything, Jerry, install the surround sound in our family room. You see, we had it set up in the basement at our old house, but since the move it was just sitting in the basement, in a box.
Why waste a couple hundred dollar system?! So, I had Jerry install it during one of Steve's trip. I thought Steve would love it. One more thing off his honey-do list. And plus, the surround system really is awesome!
We had some pretty substantial things done at the house during that trip. We got a new sidewalk:
and we had mulch delivered to finally start getting the garden beds in order.
Steve pulled in the driveway and looked at everything outside. Meanwhile, I ran inside and put in Top Gun, on blu-ray, and cranked the sound. I was beaming. Steve finally walked inside and, of course, noticed that the surround system was installed.
He was appreciative of it, but he did criticize it. He would have liked the wires buried in the wall, instead of just hidden by trim. He would have liked the speakers hung on the brackets and pointed down, instead of just mounted straight on the wall.
Hear that wind leaving, again?
Type A in full force.
Here is something that I am sure a lot of pilots battle with: not having enough hours in the day to get shit done at home. But, being a homeowner means that there is always something TO be done. Being a Type A homeowner, one would want to do everything themselves, to their standards. But again, there isn't enough time.
Steve knew I was deflated. Steve made up for it. Steve really does love the surround system, after a couple tweeks. Steve has not once mentioned the door stops, and won't probably until they break. Steve tells me he appreciates me and the things I do. It is all good...but, sometimes criticisms do sting. At least, I feel the sting.